Jokes For The Week end…. Laugh it off !!!!

They say that marriage makes a man dizzy, and it is true.
As soon as I got a wife, I lost my balance at the bank.

Q: Why do women live longer than men?
A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.
You order what you want, and then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It’s a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

What did the gangster’s son tell his dad when he failed his examination?
‘Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours, but I never told them anything!!’

What’s the difference between people who pray in church and those who pray in casinos?
The ones in the casinos are serious.

When I was young I used to pray for a bike,
then I realized that God doesn’t work that way,
so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.

A little boy went up to his father and asked :
‘Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?’
His father replied:
‘Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother,
because I still have mine.’

Jimmy’s teacher sent a note home to his mother, saying :
‘Jimmy seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much
of his time thinking about girls.’
The mother wrote back the next day:
‘If you find a solution, please advise.
I have the same problem with his father!’

After the honeymoon he was meticulously and lovingly organizing his precious golf equipment.

She said: You know dear, maybe now that we’re married you should give up golf.

He said: You know, you’re beginning to sound like my ex-wife.

She said: I didn’t know you were married before.

He said: I wasn’t.!!!!

SOURCE:::::UNKNOWN….input from a friend of mine…
Natarajan

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