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KIDS THINK FAST 

 

TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.”

TEACHER: Cindy, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables!

TEACHER: John, how do you spell “crocodile?”
JOHN: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L”
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong.
JOHN: Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it

TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
SARAH: H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
SARAH: Yesterday you said it’s H to O!

TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. 
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS: George!

TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WILLIE: Me!

TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty? 
TOMMY: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with “I.” 
ELLEN: I is…
TEACHER: No, Ellen….. Always say, “I am.”
ELLEN: All right… “I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.”

TEACHER: “Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?” 
JOHNNY: “Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time.” 

TEACHER: “George Washington not only chopped down one of his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?”
JOHNNY: “Because George still had the axe in his hand.” 

TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SAM: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook. 

TEACHER: Desmond, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
DESMOND: No, teacher, it’s the same dog! 

TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PUPIL: A teacher.

 source::::input from a friend of mine

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