A man goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table.
He walks over to her and says, “Wow, nice legs!”
She is flattered and replies, “You really think so?”
The man says, “Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now.”
Teacher: “Kids,what does the chicken give you?”
Student: “Meat!”
Teacher: “Very good! Now what does the pig give you?”
Student: “Bacon!”
Teacher: “Great! And what does the fat cow give you?”
Student: “Homework!”
So when I see stupid posts, I click like and it way say ” no one likes this ”
A minister, known for his lengthy sermons, noticed a man get up and
leave during the middle of his message. The man returned just before
the conclusion of the service. Afterwards the pastor asked the man
where he had gone.”I went to get a haircut,” was the reply.
“But,” said the minister, “why didn’t you do that before the service?”
“Because,” the gentleman said, “I didn’t need one then.”
A short Polish immigrant went to the DVLA to apply for a driver’s license.First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters.
On the bottom row were these letters: ‘C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.’
‘Can you read this?’ the optician asked.
‘Read it?’ the Polish guy replied – ‘I know the fellow.’
When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law BEFORE the criminal
gets arrested, we call him an accomplice.
When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law AFTER the criminal
has been arrested, we call him a defense attorney.
A doctor remarked on his patients, ruddy complexion. “I know” the patient said
“It’s high blood pressure, it’s from my family. “Your mother’s side, or father’s side?”
questioned the doctor.
” Neither, my wife’s.”
“What?” the doctor said “that can’t be, how can you get it from your wife’s family?”
“Oh yeah,” the patient responded, “You should meet them sometime!”
A law in Accomac county, USA
When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop,
and neither shall proceed until the other has gone
Source::::Unknown… Input from a friend of mine
Natarajan
Take off with Natarajan 