humour

Try Not to Laugh !!!…” Spelling Mistake ” !!!…

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Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.
Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.
Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

“Holy cow, Mister,” one of them said after catching his breath, “You scared us half to death — we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?”

“Those fools!” the old man grumbled. “They misspelled my name”

source:::: input from my friend

natarajan

Try not to laugh #1 :) Made for Each Other

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A Good one for Reblog !!!

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Propel Steps's avatarPROPEL STEPS

One day, a man sees his wife is busy in the kitchen and says:”Can I help?”

She says, “Sure, take this bag of potatoes, peel half of them and put them in a pot to boil.” And he does this 🙂

half Potatoes

Another day the husband says to the wife “Please go buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados please buy six.”

The wife comes back with 6 cartons of milk and the husband asks ” Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk”

“They had avocados” she replies.

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“Story : Laughology” ( Well youreadology to understandology 🙂

___________

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What is Greater Than God ? !!!…

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The Riddle That 80% of Kindergartners Answered Correctly, but Only 17% of Stanford Seniors Got Right-Fiction!

e rumor…
A simple riddle with a simple answer that was allegedly reported on Paul Harvey…and that Kindergartners answered more correctly than university seniors.

The Truth
The riddle has been around for a long time, but there is no evidence that research was ever conducted on the comparative answers of Kindergartners and Stanford University seniors.
There is also no evidence that this was reported on Paul Harvey.

The riddle:
What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it,
The rich don’t need it, And if you eat it, you’ll die?

The answer to the riddle is “nothing.”
Nothing is greater than God.
Nothing is more evil than the Devil.
The poor have nothing.
The rich need nothing.
And if you eat nothing, you’ll die.

A real example of the eRumor as it has appeared on the Internet:

Paul Harvey RIDDLE:

When asked this riddle, 80% of kindergarten kids got the answer,
compared to 17% of Stanford University seniors.
What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it,
The rich need it, And if you eat it, you’ll die?

 

source ::::truth or fiction.com

natarajan

” Are You Smarter than ” Seniors ” !!!

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This is a test for us ‘older kids’!

The answers are printed below, (after the questions) but don’t cheat! answer them first…..

01. After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, Who was that masked man? Invariably, someone would answer, I don’t know, but he left this behind. What did he leave behind?________________.

02. When the Beatles first came to the U.S. .In early 1964, we all watched them on The _______________ Show.

03. Get your kicks, __________________.’

04. ‘The story you are about to see is true. The names have been changed to ___________________.’

05. ‘In the jungle, the mighty jungle, ________________.’

06. After the Twist, The Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we ‘danced’ under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go in a dancecalled the ‘_____________.’

07. Nestle’s makes the very best… _________ ______.’

08. Satchmo was America ‘s ‘Ambassador of Goodwill.’ Our parents shared this great jazz trumpet player with us. His name was _________________.

09. What takes a licking and keeps on ticking? _______________.

10. Red Skeleton’s hobo character was named __________________ and Red always ended his television show by saying, ‘Good

Night, and ‘________ ________.. ‘

11. Some Americans who protested the Vietnam War did so by burning their______________.

12. The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other names did it go by? ____________ &_______________.

13. In 1971, singer Don MacLean sang a song about, ‘the day the music died.’ This was a tribute to ___________________.

14. We can remember the first satellite placed into orbit. The Russians did it. It was called ___________________.

15. One of the big fads of the late 50’s and 60’s was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called the __ ______________.

Answers:
01. The Lone Ranger left behind a silver bullet.
02. The Ed Sullivan Show
03. On Route 66
04. To protect the innocent.
05. The Lion Sleeps Tonight
06. The limbo
07. Chocolate
08. Louis Armstrong
09. The Timex watch
10. Freddy, The Freeloader and ‘Good Night and God Bless.’
11. Draft cards (Bras were also burned. Not flags, as some have guessed)
12. Beetle or Bug
13. Buddy Holly
14. Sputnik
15. Hoola-hoop

Send this to your ‘older’ friends, (Better known as Seniors.) It will drive them crazy! And also keep them busy and let them forget their aches and pains for a few minutes !!!

source::::baba mail site

natarajan

“படிக்க …சிரிக்க …படிக்க ….சிரிக்க…” !!!

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ஆசிரியர்: உன்னுடைய வயதில் ஜனாதிபதிகள் அனைவரின் பேரையும் வரிசை கிரமமாகச் சொல்வேன்.

மாணவன்: உங்கள் வயதில் அப்போது மூன்று நான்கு ஜனாதிபதிகள்தான் இருந்திருப்பார்கள் டீச்சர்!

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தாமதமாக வந்த மாணவனைப் பார்த்து ஆசிரியர் கேட்டார்: “”ஏன் லேட்?”

மாணவன்: வழியில் ஒரு தகவல் பலகை இருந்தது டீச்சர். அதில்…

இடையே குறுக்கிட்ட ஆசிரியர்: நீ லேட்டாக வர்ற அளவுக்கு அந்த பலகையில் என்ன எழுதியிருந்தது.

மாணவன்: பள்ளிக்கூடம் வருகிறது. மெதுவாகச் செல்!

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புதிதாக சேர்ந்த வேலைக்கார பெண்ணிடம் வீட்டுக்காரி கேட்டாள்: “”மீன் தொட்டியில் உள்ள மீன்களுக்கு இன்று புதிதாக தண்ணீர் மாற்றினாயா?”

வேலைக்காரப் பெண்: “”இல்லையம்மா! நேற்று ஊற்றிய தண்ணீரையே அவை இன்னும் குடித்து முடிக்கவில்லையே!”

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டிராபிக் போலிஸ்: மேடம்! நீங்கள் மணிக்கு 70 மைல் வேகத்தில் காரை ஓட்டி வந்திருக்கிறீர்கள்

பெண்: வாவ்! இது மிகவும் ஆச்சரியமில்லையா? நான் கார் ஓட்டக் கற்றுக் கொண்டதே நேற்றிலிருந்துதான்!

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வீட்டுப் பெண்மணி: எப்போதும் எங்கள் வீட்டிற்கே வந்து பிச்சை எடுக்கிறாயே ஏன்?

பிச்சைக்காரன்: டாக்டர்தான் சொன்னார்

வீட்டுப் பெண்மணி: டாக்டர் என்ன சொன்னார்?

பிச்சைக்காரன்: உன்னுடைய உடல் நலனுக்கு எந்த உணவு ஒத்துக்கொள்கிறதோ அதையே தொடர்ந்து சாப்பிடு என்றார்.

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டாக்டர்: உங்கள் மனைவிக்கு “லோக்கல்’ அனஸ்தீஷியா கொடுக்கலாமா?

கணவன்: நோ. நோ. என்னிடம் ஏராளமான பணமிருக்கிறது. எவ்வளவு செலவானாலும் பரவாயில்லை, வெளிநாட்டிலிருந்து இறக்குமதி செய்யப்பட்டதாகவே கொடுங்கள்.

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டாக்டர்: என்னிடம் வருவதற்கு முன் நீங்கள் வேறு டாக்டர் யாரிடமாவது சென்றீர்களா?

நோயாளி: இல்லை டாக்டர். இந்தத் தெருவில் உள்ள மருந்து கடைக்காரரிடம்தான் சென்றேன்.

டாக்டர்: அந்த மடையன் என்ன சொன்னான்?

நோயாளி: அவர்தான் உங்களிடம் போகச் சொன்னார்!

 

source::::Dinamani …TamilDaily  Blogsite

natarajan

Jokes For The Weekend !!!

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  Maths

2+5, The Son of a Bitch is 7..
A little boy was doing his math homework & saying:
2+5, the son of a bitch is 7
3+6, the son of a bitch is 9. . .
His Mom: What are you doing?
Boy: I’m doing maths homework
Mom: this is how your teacher taught you?
Boy: Yes
Infuriated, Mom asked the teacher the next day-
‘What are you teaching my son in maths?’
Teacher: Right now, we are learning addition.
Mom: you teaching them to say 2+ 2, the Son of a bitch is 4?
Teacher after laughing: What I taught them was, 2+2, The Sum of Which is 4 !  

 
Take a break and enjoy A funny interview……

OFFICER : WHAT IS YOUR NAME ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : TELL ME PROPERLY

CANDIDATE : MOHAN PAL SIR

OFFICER : YOUR FATHER’S NAME ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?

CANDIDATE : MANMOHAN PAL SIR

OFFICER : YOUR NATIVE PLACE

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : IS IT MADHYA PRADESH ?

CANDIDATE : NO, MUNNUR PAL SIR

OFFICER : WHAT IS YOUR QUALIFICATION?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : (ANGRILY) WHAT IS IT ?

CANDIDATE : METRIC PASS

OFFICER : WHY DO YOU NEED A JOB ?

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?

CANDIDATE : MONEY PROBLEM SIR

OFFICER : DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : EXPLAIN YOURSELF CLEARLY

CANDIDATE : MAGNANIMOUS PERSONALITY SIR

OFFICER : THIS DISCUSSION IS NOWHERE, YOU MAY GO NOW

CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

OFFICER : WHAT IS IT NOW

CANDIDATE : MY PERFORMANCE….?

OFFICER : MP !!!

CANDIDATE : WHAT IS THAT SIR..?

OFFICER : MENTALLY PUNCTURED   !!!

 

 

Spanish Computer 

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her  class that in Spanish, 

unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.  
‘House’ for instance, is feminine:  ‘la casa.’
‘Pencil,’ however, is masculine:  ‘el lapiz.’

A student asked, ‘What gender is  ‘computer’?’

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two 

groups, male and female, and asked thee four reasons for its 
recommendation.

The men’s group decided that computer’ should definitely be of 

the feminine  gender (‘la computadora’), because:

1. No one but their creator understands  their internal logic;

2. The native language they use to  communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to  everyone else;

3.  Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory  

for possible later retrieval; and

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one,  find yourself spending half 

your paycheck on accessories  for it.

(THIS GETS  BETTER!)

The women’s group, however, concluded  that computers should be Masculine 

(‘el  computador’), because:

1.They have a  lot of data but still can’t think for themselves;

2.They are supposed to  help you solve problems,  but half the  time 

they ARE the problem; and

3. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had  waited 

a little longer, you could have gotten a better  model.

The women won…!

 

source:::: input from a friend of mine

natarajan

Guards ” Caught Off Guard ” …. Hilarious Video !!!

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Being a professional guard isn’t an easy job. You have to be ready to perform complex manuavers, ride horses, be quick on your step and above all – never break formation.

Well, that’s how it’s supposed to be, anyway…  even when they are ” caught off guard ” !!!!

 

source :::: baba mail and you tube

natarajan

 

Laughter The Best Medicine …” Bijiness is Bijiness” !!!

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Bijness is Bijiness
One day in a school in London, a teacher said to a class of 5-year-olds
I’ll give 10 pounds to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who
ever lived.”

An Irish boy put his hand up and said, “It was St. Patrick.”
The teacher said, “Sorry Paddy, that’s not correct.”
Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, “It was St. Andrew.”
The teacher replied, “I’m sorry, Hamish, that’s not right either.”
Then a Jewish boy put his hand up and said “David”,
The Buddhist boy said “Gautama Buddha” and the Muslim boy said “Mohammed”.
They all were not successful. Finally, a Gujju Patel boy raised his hand and said, “It
was Jesus Christ.”

The teacher said, “That’s absolutely right, Jignesh, come up here and I’ll give
you the 10 pounds that I promised.”

As the teacher was giving Jignesh his money, she said, “You know Jignesh, since
you’re a Hindu Gujarati; I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ.”

Jignesh Patel replied, “Yes. In my heart I knew it was Krishna, but Bijness is
Bijness!!!!! !

source::::input from a friend of mine

natarajan