Joke For The Day … ” Not only a Can Of Peaches , But also A Can of Peas…” !!!

” > > The concerned husband:
> >
> > A cranky old woman was arrested for shoplifting at a grocery
> > store. She gave everyone a hard time, from the store manager
> > to the security guard to the arresting officer who took her
> > away, complaining and criticizing throughout the process.
> >
> >
> > When she appeared before the judge, the judge asked what she
> > had stolen from the store. The lady defiantly replied,
> > “Just a stupid can of peaches.”
> >
> > The judge then asked why she had done it. She replied,
> > “I was hungry and forgot to bring any cash to the
> > store.”
> >
> >
> > The judge asked how many peaches were in the can. She
> > replied, “Nine, but what do you care about that?”
> >
> > The judge patiently said, “Well, ma’am, because
> > I’m going to give you nine days in jail — one day for
> > each peach.”

As the judge was about to drop gavel,
the lady’s long suffering husband raised his hand
and asked if he might speak.
> >
> >
> > The judge said, “Yes, what do you have to add?”
> >
> > The husband said, “Your Honour, she also stole a can of
> > peas.”

 

source :::: input from a friend of mine

natarajan

Guess The Profession of Kesavan !!!

  If Parsis can have their names as per their professions, why can’t
Tamilians also have the same?
(After all, we are not Britishers to have names such as Barber, Cook,
Underwood, etc…). So, here
goes….the list !!!!

 Doctor — Vaidyanathan

Dentist — Pallavan

Lawyer — Kesavan

Financier — Dhanasekaran

Cardiologist — Irudhayaraj

Pediatrist — Kuzhandaisamy

Psychiatrist — Mano

Sex Therapist — Kamadevan

Marriage Counsellor — Kalyanasundaram

Ophthalmologist –Kannappan or kannayiram

ENT Specialist — Neelakandan

Diabetologist — Sakkarapani

Nutritionist — Arogyasamy

Hypnotist — Sokkalingam

Mentalist — Budhisikamani

Exorcist — Maatruboodham

Magician — Mayandi

Builder — Sengalvarayan

Painter — Chitraguptan

Meteorologist — Kaarmegam

Agriculturist — Pachaiyappan

Horticulturist — Pushpavanam

Landscaper — Bhuminathan

Barber — Kondaiappan

Beggar — Pichai

Bartender — Madhusudhan

Alcoholic — Kallapiraan

Exhibitionist — Ambalavaanan

Fiction writer — Naavalan

Makeup Man — Singaram

Milk Man — Paul Raj    (Paul to be pronounced the Tamil way!)

Dairy Farmer — Pasupathi

Dog Groomer — Naayagan

Snake Charmer — Nagamurthi

Mountain Climber — Yezhumalai

Javelin Thrower — Velayudam

Polevaulter — Thaandavarayan

Weight Lifter — Balaraman

Karate Expert — Kailaasam

Kick Boxer — Ethiraj

Batsman — Dhandiappan

Bowler — Balaji

Spin Bowler — Thirupathi

Female Spin Bowler — Thirupura Sundari

Driver — Sarathy

Devoted and Sincere Driver — Parthasarathy  

source:::: input from a friend of mine

natarajan

Message For the Day… ” God Expects You to Fill Your Heart with Love …”

Control your tongue as it always craves for a variety of delicacies. Ask yourself this question, “O tongue, how many bags of rice, wheat and vegetables, how many delicacies have you tasted? Fie on you if you are still unsatisfied!” Eat sufficiently to satisfy your hunger and sustain your body, without giving undue importance to taste. Likewise, your eyes must see God instead of watching unsacred things on the television or video. May your ears listen to the stories of the Lord instead of vain gossip. All that you see and hear gets imprinted on your heart and unsacred things pollute it. When your heart is polluted, life becomes meaningless. Human heart is like a pen. The colour of the words that you write will be the same as the colour of the ink in the pen. God expects you to fill your heart with love. Then, all that you think say and do will be suffused with love and your life shall become sacred.

 Sathya Sai Baba

Joke for The Day…”Does the Camping Ground has its own B.C …”?

A rather old fashioned lady, always quite delicate and elegant, especially in her language, was planning a weeks holiday in Sydney with her husband, so she wrote to a particular camping ground and asked for a reservation.

She wanted to make sure that the camping ground was fully equipped, but didn’t know quite how to ask about the toilet facilities. She just couldn’t bring herself

to write the word “toilet” in her letter.

After much thought, she finally came up with the old fashioned term “Bathroom closet” but when she wrote it down, she still thought she was being too forward, so she started all over again, rewrote the letter, and referred to the bathroom closet as the B.C.

“Does the camping ground have it’s own B.C.” is what she wrote.

Well, the camping ground owner wasn’t a bit old fashioned, and he just couldn’t figure out what the old lady was talking about, so he showed the letter around a few of the campers and the only thing they could come up with was that B.C. stood for Baptist Church, so he wrote the following reply.

Dear Madam,

I regret very much the delay in answering your letter, but I now take the pleasure of informing you that a B.C. is located nine miles north of our camping ground, and is capable of seating 250 people at one time.

I admit that it is quite a distance away if you are in the habit of going regularly but no doubt you will be pleased to know that a great number of campers go there and many take their lunches along and make a day of it. They usually arrive nice and early and stay quite late.

The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded we had to stand up the whole time we were there. It may interest you to know that there is a special supper planned there to raise money to buy more seats so that everyone will be able to sit in comfort.

I would like to say that it pains me very much not to be able to go more regularly, but it is surely no lack of desire on my part, just that I am so busy most of the time.

As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort to go, especially in the cold weather. If you decide to come down to our camping ground perhaps I could go with you the first time you go, sit with you and introduce you to all the other folks.

Remember this is a very friendly community  ….

source:::: joke a day.com

natarajan

Message for the Day…’ Cultivate Good Thoughts and and Perform Good Deeds…”

The entire creation is based on truth. Where there is truth, there you find plenty and prosperity. Human life is not meant to enjoy physical comforts and worldly pleasures, which are momentary. It is meant to set an ideal to the rest of the world. Ask yourself, “Having lived all these years, what is the ideal I have set and achieved?” You might have done a few good deeds in life, but they may be outdone by the number of bad deeds you may have performed. That is not the quality of a human being. Cultivate good thoughts, speak good words and perform good deeds. That is true humanness. We remember the ancient sages and seers even today because of the good deeds they have performed. Do unto others what you would like others to do unto you. Do not indiscriminately follow the mind, for the mind is like a mad monkey. Follow your conscience. Love is the undercurrent of all this. So lead a life suffused with love.

Sathya Sai Baba

Just For Laugh … ” Do you Understand What a team is … “

At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 7-year-old hockey players aside and asked, “Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?”
The little boy nodded in the affirmative.
“Do you understand that what matters is not whether we win or lose, but how we play together as a team?”
The little boy nodded yes.
“So,” the coach continued, “I’m sure you know, when a penalty is called, you shouldn’t argue, curse, attack the referee, or call him a pecker-head.”
Do you understand all that?”
Again the little boy nodded.
He continued, “And when I call you off the ice so that another boy gets a chance to play, it’s not good sportsmanship to call your coach ‘a dumb  and idiot , is it?”
Again the little boy nodded.
“Good,” said the coach. “Now go over there and explain all that to your mother.“
source::::baba mail.com
natarajan

Glowing Blue Waves …Awesome Mother Nature !!!

It may take you by surprise, but some of the coolest stuff on this earth actually occurs naturally, even though it seems totally fake. Take this beach, for example. All of the glowing stars scattered along the sand aren’t the result of some clever Photoshop skills. They’re completely real and this isn’t the first time it has happened on this beach in the Maldives. Mother Nature can be so awesome.

I would pay almost anything to see these heavenly blue waves in person. They seem too beautiful to really exist. I didn’t think I’d ever say this, but phytoplankton are so cool.

Source: reddit.com  & viralnova trending site

natarajan

Jokes For the Day…” What comes after Ten ?… “

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses.
She started her class by saying, “Everyone who thinks you’re stupid, stand up!”
After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.
The teacher said, “Do you think you’re stupid, Little Johnny?”
“No, ma’am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!”

………………………….

Little Johnny’s class were on an outing to their local police station where they saw pictures, of the ten most wanted men, tacked to a bulletin board. On the way out of the police station Little Johnny said to the officer, “it was so nice of you to put my daddy’s picture up there.”

……………………….

 

Little Johnny comes downstairs crying. His mother asked, “What’s the matter now?”
“Dad was hanging pictures, and just hit his thumb with hammer,” said little Johnny through his tears. “That’s not so serious,” soothed his mother. “I know you are upset, but a big boy like you shouldn’t cry at something like that. Why didn’t you just laugh?
“I did!” sobbed Johnny.

………………………….

 

A teacher asked little Johnny if he knows his 1 to 10 well
“Yes! Of course! My pop taught me…even more than 10”
“Good. What comes after three?”
“Four,” answers the boy.
“What comes after six?”
“Seven.”
“Very good,” says the teacher. “Your erm…dad did a good job. Now…so what comes after…lets say ten?”
“A jack”

source:::::joke a day.com

natarajan

 

” You are the only Person responsible for Your Life … “

 

 Story  With A  Lesson and Message ….
 A Notice appeared in the Notice Board  on the Morning  when   the employees of  a Company entered the office …
“Yesterday the person who has been hindering your growth in this company passed away. You are requested to join the funeral”

In the beginning, they got sad for the death of one of their colleagues, but after a while they got curious to know who was the man who hindered their growth.

Everyone thought: Well atleast the man who hindered my progress died!

One by one the thrilled employees got closer to the coffin, and when they looked inside they were speechless. They stood shocked in silence, as if someone had touched the deepest part of their soul. There was a mirror inside the coffin and everyone who looked inside could see himself.

There was a sign next to the mirror that read:
There is only one person who is capable to set limits to your growth…It is …YOU . You are the only person who can influence your happiness, success and realization.

Your life does not change when your boss friends or company change…..your life changes when you change…you go beyond your limiting beliefs and you realize you are the only one responsible for your life.

It’s the way you face life-  that makes the difference!

If an egg is broken from outside force, life ends… but if it is broken from inside force, life begins. Great things always begin from our inside.

source:::: input from a friend of mine
natarajan