Jokes For the Day…!!!

A widower who never paid any attention to his wife while she was alive now found himself missing her desperately. He went to a psychic to see if he could contact his late wife. The psychic went into a trance. A strange breeze wafted through the darkened room, and suddenly, the man heard the unmistakable voice of his dearly departed wife. “Honey!” he cried. “Is that you?” “Yes, my husband.” “Are you happy?” “Yes, my husband.” “Happier than you were with me?” “Yes, my husband.” “Then Heaven must be an amazing place!” “I’m not in Heaven, dear.”   

………………….

A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.
He asks, “What was that for?”
She says, “I found a piece of paper in your pocket with ‘Betty Sue’ written on it.”
He says, “Jeez, honey, remember last week when I went to the track? ‘Betty Sue’ was the name of the horse I went there to bet on.” She shrugs and walks away. Three days later he’s reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan.
He asks, “What was that for?”
She answers, “Your horse called.”

……………….

Stumpy Grinder and his wife Martha were from Portland, Maine. Every year they went to the Portland Fair and every year Stumpy said, “Ya know, Mahtha, I’d like ta get a ride in that theah aihplane.” And every year, Martha would say “I know, Stumpy, but that aihplane ride costs ten dollahs .. and ten dollahs is ten dollahs.”
So one year Stumpy says, “By Jeebers, Mahtha, I’m 71 yeahs old, and if I don’t go this time I may nevah go.” Martha replies, “Stumpy, that there aihplane ride is ten dollahs … and ten dollahs is ten dollahs.”
So the pilot overhears then and says, “Folks, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say ONE WORD, then I won’t charge you. But just ONE WORD and it’s ten dollars.”
They agree and up they go… the pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He does it one more time, and there is still no word… so he lands.
He turns to Stumpy as they come to a stop and says, “By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to holler out, but you didn’t.”
And Stumpy replies “Well, I was gonna say something when Mahtha fell out … but ten dollahs is ten dollahs.”
……………………..
source::::joke a day.com
natarajan

Read more:http://www.ajokeaday.com/clasificacion.asp?ID=48#ixzz2vfqJ66aA

 

 

Joke of the Day… ” You Must be 193 years old …”!!!

A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. To his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came down the long line to where the lawyer was, and greeted him warmly. Then St. Peter and one of his assistants took the lawyer by the hands and guided him up to the front of the line, and into a comfortable chair by his desk. The lawyer said, “I don’t mind all this attention, but what makes me so special?” St. Peter replied, “Well, I’ve added up all the hours for which you billed your clients, and by my calculation you must be about 193 years old!”    

source::::joke a day.com

natarajan

Message For the Day…” Dharma will never perish …”

In the Bhagavad Gita, the Lord declares, “Whenever righteousness (Dharma) declines, I make My advent in the world.Dharma will never perish.” It is the practice of Dharma which is becoming weaker day by day, and not Dharma as such. Many times clouds cover the Sun. In such a scenario, the people on earth may not be able to see the Sun. Just because people cannot see, does it mean that the Sun doesn’t exist? No, Sun exists! Temporarily the Sun is hidden by the clouds; therefore people are unable to see it. Nobody can say that the Sun has perished, can they? Similarly, Sathya and Dharma have the effulgence of the Sun. Truth is the Sun, Dharma is the effulgence of the Sun. They are interdependent like matter and energy. Matter and energy cannot exist without each other. Similarly Sun and its radiance are reflection of each other. Sathya, the Sun andDharma, its effulgence redeem the world.   

Sathya Sai Baba

 

Magnificent Mars !!!

Anthony Wesley captured this glorious telescope image of the planet Mars on March 6. He wrote on his Facebook page:

Some good seeing this morning for the first time in many weeks…. I nearly missed it as the forecast was for cloud and rain, but at 3 a.m. it was clear although I could see lightning off in the distance…

North polar cap at top left, Syrtis Major to the lower left, cloud over the Elysium volcanoes at upper right, still bright blue cloud in Hellas at bottom. A faint band of equatorial cloud is also visible.

When to see Mars in 2014

A few days earlier, he got this awesome shot of Mars’ two moons, Phobos and Deimos.

Anthony Wesley also caught both of Mars' moons - brighter and closer Phobos and fainter, more distant Deimos - on March 2, 2014.

Of the image above, he wrote:

Third time lucky… got both Phobos and Deimos this time. Operating the GS3 camera in 12 bit mode gives me a little more headroom. Once again the diffraction from my 3 vane spider is prominent. 3 minutes @ 10fps, no filter (L channel). 16″ f/4 newtonian @ 6000mm focal length

source::::earth sky news

natarajan

 

” One Day Your Life will Flash Before your Eyes…”

“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.”

 

 May Sai bless us all to live happily and make others glad that we are a part of their lives. May Sai help us to forgive, forget and let go of all our past failures and move on with courage , confidence and with the Faith in Sai – that whatever will happen- will happen for our own good ..   
source::::H.Deepa in debu7370.blogspot.com
natarajan

Old Tech . Terminology Dies Hard !!!… Here are Few Examples …

 
You probably don’t remember the last time you actually “dialed” a phone number, but you might remember the last time you said you did.

Old terminology dies hard. Though technology changes swiftly from day to day, there are still old-fashioned terms we cling to, using them frequently even though they no longer have a relevant meaning. We “tune in” to the “tube,” all with the aid of the trusty “clicker.”

Unless you’re a Luddite exclusively using obsolete technology, you’ll recognize these nine ancient tech terms as relics of a bygone era.

1. ‘Dial’

 

ro1

 

Plenty of people still say they’re “dialing” a phone number. The term goes back to the beginning of the telephone era, when phones had a rotary dial — a switchboard users needed to swing each number. Rotary phones haven’t been used for decades, but people still say they’re dialing away.

2. ‘Hanging up’

Unless you’re using a pay phone (which isn’t likely), you aren’t “hanging up” anything. That phrase refers to ending a phone call by placing a corded phone back into its holder, which, most often, literally hung on a wall. Ending a call today usually just requires the click of a button or the tap of a smartphone screen.

3. ‘Roll up/down the window’

In ye olden days, cars had a handle that you needed to rotate in order to pull the window up or down. Modern cars aren’t made with a crank anymore — they just have a button or switch that you can click upward or downward to maneuver the window direction.

4. ‘Carbon copy’

 

copy

 

This term originally referred to the days before Xeroxing, when, in order to make copies, you would need to place a sheet of carbon paper behind the original sheet so the ink transferred over.

Now, the term lives on in email (when you CC someone, you send them a “carbon copy” of your email). It’s also popular in everyday conversation, calling two similar items carbon copies of each other.

5. ‘Clicker’

Even if you don’t say this, you know someone who does. Plenty of people comfortably refer to a TV’s remote control as a clicker, because in the early days of television, the control used to make a very loud clicking sound.

6. ‘The tube’

 

colortv

 

Referring to a TV as “the tube” is a sign you aren’t ready for the HD age. TVs as we know them now are flat-panel LCD wonders, whereas their predecessors were made with cathode ray tubes (hence the nickname). Tube television sets have essentially been phased out, but the name persists (and we fondly remember the nickname every time we click over to YouTube).

7. ‘Tuning in’

The phrase was popular with TV announcers when viewers had to adjust frequencies on their sets. Users literally had to ‘tune in’ to enjoy their shows. In the ultra digital age, that’s yesteryear’s problem.

8. ‘Tape’

 

tape1

 

There are several ways people still use the word “tape,” but many use it when talking about recording. Using it interchangeably with the term (or “DVR-ing” or “TiVo-ing”) is a relic leftover from the glory days of actual tapes and VHS.

9. ‘Rewind’

This is essentially the universal term for reversing something to watch it again, whether it’s a YouTube video, a movie streaming on Netflix or even a DVD. However, there’s nothing to wind anymore — to rewind something requires physical tape.

Have something to add to this story? Share it in the comments.

source::::;Yohana Desta in   mashable.com
natarajan

” You Have Signed The Marksheet, But You did not Give me the Grade … ” !!!

The father of our nation was too smart than this ‘gora’ chap

When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their “arguments” were very common.

One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor. The professor, in his arrogance, said, “Mr Gandhi: you do not understand… a pig and a bird do not sit together to eat “, to which Gandhi replies, “You do not worry professor, I’ll fly away “, and he went and sat at another table.
Mr. Peters, green with rage, decides to take revenge on the next test, but Gandhi responds brilliantly to all questions. Then, Mr. Peters asked him the following question, “Mr Gandhi, if you are walking down the street and find a package, and within it there is a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot of money; which one will you take?”
Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, “the one with the money, of course”.
Mr. Peters, smiling, said, “I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom,

don’t you think?”
“Each one take

  s

 what one doesn’t have”, responded Gandhi indifferently.
Mr. Peters, already hysteric, writes on the exam sheet the word “idiot” and gives it to Gandhi. Gandhi takes the exam sheet and sits down. A few minutes later, Gandhi goes to the professor and says, “Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade.”   

source::::: input from a friend of mine
natarajan

” Everything Happens for a Reason…..”

 

It is My special characteristic that I look always to, and provide for the welfare of those devoteeswho worship Me whole-heartedly with their minds ever fixed on Me.
May our Sadguru Sainath Shower his kind grace on our loved ones and bless them with all the love in the world, all the joy that a heart can hold, all the good health that can make our life much more precious than gold and prosperity that will make them go one step closer to bliss and God alone. 
Sai Bhakt,  
The Story of Life
Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or to help you figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be (possibly your roommate, neighbor, coworker, long lost friend, lover, or even a complete stranger) but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.
And sometimes things happen to you that may seem horrible, painful, and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower, or heart.
Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.
The people you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience help to create who you become. Even the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact, they are probably the most poignant and important ones. If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart. If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.
Make every day count!!! Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything that you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people that you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free, and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to. Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don’t believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you. You can make of your life anything you wish. Create your own life then go out and live it with absolutely no regrets.
source::::debu7370.blogspot.in

Flipkart… Answer to US Giant Amazon …Amazing Performance !!!

Flipkart, India’s answer to US online giant Amazon, said Saturday its sales would cross the milestone $1 billion-mark this year, ahead of schedule, in the country’s exploding e-commerce market.

Founded in 2007 by two ex-Amazon.com employees and university friends, Flipkart.com has become India’s biggest shopping portal hit and has drawn backers such as New-York based venture capitalists Tiger Global Management LLC.

“In March 2011 we announced by 2015 we wanted to hit $1 billion” in sales when they stood at just $10 million, said founders Sanchin Bansal and Binny Bansal, who happen to share the same surname but are unrelated.

Now the privately held firm expects to hit $1 billion in sales “one year before our target” which means “we’ve grown 100 times in the last three years,” the pair, who pool operational responsibilities, said in a statement.

The figures reinforce Flipkart’s leadership position in the Indian e-retail market.

The founders, now both 32, said they were “happy and proud” at the progress of Flipkart in which they invested an initial $10,000.

The Bansals are seen as typical of the new risk-ready breed of entrepreneurs that has emerged in India amid years of fast economic growth, relying not on inherited wealth but their own-start up talents to launch businesses.

“E-merchandise retailing sales stood at $1.6 billion in 2013. By 2018, we think they will be $14 billion and in 2023 they will reach $60 billion,” Saloni Nangia, president of leading consultancy Technopak Advisors, told AFP.

While there were already Indian online sellers, Flipkart helped sales take off by allowing customers to pay cash-on-delivery, a move Nangia calls a “game-changer”.

An increasing number of Indians are going online but they are uncomfortable giving credit card details over the Internet. Others do not have a credit card and the Flipkart method allows them to place orders.

“This cash-on-delivery system helped consumers gain trust in online shopping — they saw products arrive,” Nangia said.

Flipkart began selling books but then expanded to mobile phones, televisions, cameras, computers and home appliances.

It has yet to report a profit in the fiercely competitive market with its nearest rival, eBay-backed Snapdeal, targeting $1 billion turnover by mid-decade. The world’s biggest online retailer, Amazon, also entered the market last June.

More retailers are seen going online as real estate is costly “so it makes it hard to have bricks-and-mortar stores”, said Nangia.

India’s vast young population, rapidly embracing the Internet, would “drive the e-tailing story”, she added.

Now, months after putting retail store plans in India on hold, the world’s largest retailer, Walmart, is readying a major e-merchandising push in the country based on the Amazon model, media reports say.

source:::::google news site

natarajan